Advice Column

If you have a question you would like Shira to answer, send it to

Q.  How important is paying off debt to living a comfortable lifestyle?

A.  First let me warn you my opinion on this topic is an unpopular one.  Keep in mind situations vary.  You may need to have your specifics evaluated to get a response that suits you personally.

Here are my general thoughts.  As long as your assets outweigh your debt, your debts are paid on time, and you have something set aside for a rainy day; in my opinion you’re fine.  As long as you live you’ll have a debt to pay even if it’s just taxes.  I am not endorsing creating unnecessary debt.  I’m just saying don’t sweat.  Make strides to eliminate debt but don’t sweat it.

Q. At what age do you give up on the possibility of marriage?

A. I don’t believe marriage has a deadline.  In my opinion it is something you can be too young for but never too old. If you feel like you’re running out of time, you’re probably putting too much weight on the idea of marriage.  Redirect your focus.  Enjoy your life as it is.  If it’s meant for someone to be added to it, it will happen.  In the meantime, live.

Q. Is it okay to not to speak to your significant other everyday?

A. Unfortunately we can fall into traps with relationship rules of what is and what isn’t okay.  Each relationship is different and will operate using different guidelines.  It’s up to you and your SO to decide what is okay.  There will be times when your opinions differ.  That’s when you two have to come to a compromise. How often you communicate and by what means needs to be decided within your relationship.  You may find that you need daily communication or you may not find it necessary.  Both are okay as long as both parties are in agreeance.